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Technique of Self Enquiry-chp 8
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On account of this fear of death, the concentration of
Sri Bhagavan was fixed and deeply immersed in Self attention in order to find out ‘What is my existence ? What
is it that dies ?’. Thus it is proved by what Sri Bhagavan
Himself did that, as we have been explaining all along, only
such a firm fixing of our attention on Self is ‘Self-enquiry’
(atma-vichara). He has confirmed the same idea in the work’
Who am I’?”, where He says: “Always keeping the mind (the
attention) fixed In Self (in the feeling ‘I’) alone is called Self enquiry’..
Remaining firmly in Self-abidance, without giving
even the least room to the rising of any thought other than the thought of Self (that is, without giving even the least
attention to any second or third person, but only to Self),
is surrendering oneself to God (which alone is called
parabhakti, the supreme devotion)”.
When Sri Bhagavan
was asked,
‘What is the means and technique to hold
constantly on to the ‘I’ -consciousness?’.
He revealed in His
works the technique of Self-enquiry which, as explained
above.
He had undertaken in His early age, but in a more
detailed manner as follows:-
“Self (atman) is that which is self-shining in the form
‘I am that I am’.
One should not imagine it to be anything
such as this or that (light or sound).
Imagining or thinking
thus is itself bondage.
Since Self is the consciousness which
is neither light nor darkness, let it not be imagined as a light
of any kind. That thought itself would be a bondage.
The
annihilation of the ego (the primal thought) alone is
liberation (mukti).
All the three bodies consisting of the five
sheaths are contained in the feeling ‘I am the body’;
therefore if, by the enquiry ‘Who is this I ?’ (that is, by Self attention), the identification with (attachment to) the gross
body alone is removed, the identification with the other two
bodies will automatically cease to exist. As it is only by
clinging to this that the identifications with the subtle and
casual bodies live, there is no need to annihilate these
identifications separately.
“How to enquire? Can the body, which is insentient
like a log and such things, shine and function as ‘I’? It
cannot.
“The body cannot say ‘I’ ...”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 23
Therefore, discarding the corpse-like body as an actual
corpse and remaining without even uttering the word ‘I’
vocally -–
“Discarding the body as a corpse, not uttering the
word ‘I’ by mouth, but seeking with the mind
diving inwards ‘Whence does this I rise ?’ alone is
the path of knowledge (jnana marga) ...”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 29
–
if keenly observed what that feeling is which now shines’
as ‘I’, a sphurana alone will be experienced without sound
as ‘I-I’ in the heart.
“When the mind reaches the Heart by enquiring
within ‘Who am I ?’, he, ‘I’ (the ego), falling down
abashed, the One (the Reality) appears
spontaneously as ‘I-I’ (I am that I am) ...”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 30
“When sought within ‘What is the place from
which it rises as I ?’, ‘I’ (the ego) will die. This is
Self-enquiry.”
‘Upadesa Undhiyar’, verse 19
“Where this ‘I’ dies, there and then shines forth spontaneously the One as ‘I-I’ .
That alone is the
Whole (puranam)”
‘Upadesa Undhiyar’, verse 20
“If without leaving it we just be, the sphurana,
completely annihilating the feeling of individuality – the
ego, ‘I am the body’, finally will come to an end just as the
camphor flame dies out.
This alone is proclaimed to be
liberation by Sages and scriptures.
“Although in the beginning, on account of the
tendencies towards sense-objects (vishaya-vasanas) which
have been recurring down the ages, thoughts rise in
countless numbers like the waves of the ocean, they will all
perish as the aforesaid Self-attention becomes more and
more intense.
Since even the doubt “Is it possible to destroy
all of them and to remain as Self alone ?’ is only a thought,
without giving room even to that thought, one should
persistently cling fast to Self-attention.
However great a
sinner one may be, if, not lamenting ‘Oh, I am a sinner!
How can I attain salvation?’ but completely giving up even
the thought that one is a sinner, one is steadfast in Self attention, one will surely be saved.
Therefore everyone,
diving deep within himself with desirelessness (vairagya),
can attain the pearl of Self.
“As long as there are tendencies towards sense-objects
in the mind, (since they will always create some subtle or
gross world-appearance) so long the enquiry ‘Who am I?’ is
necessary.
As and when thoughts rise of their own accord,
one should annihilate all of them through enquiry then and
there in their very place of origin. What is the means to
annihilate them?
If other thoughts rise disturbing
Self-attention, one should, without attempting to complete
them, enquire ‘To whom did they rise?, It will “then be
known ‘To me’; immediately, if we observe ‘Who is this I
that thinks?’, the mind (our power of attention which was
hitherto engaged in thinking of second and third persons)
will turn back to its source (Self). Hence (since no one is
there to attend to them), the other thoughts which had risen will also subside.
By repeatedly practising thus, the power
of the mind to, abide in its source increases.
When the mind
thus abides in the Heart, the first thought, ‘I’ (‘I am the
body’, the rising ‘I’), which is the root of all other thoughts,
itself having vanished, the ever-existing Self (the being ‘I’)
alone will shine.
The place (or state) where even the
slightest trace of the thought ‘I’ (‘I am this, that, the body,
Brahman and so on’) does not exist, alone is Self.
That alone
is called Silence (maunam).
“After coming to know that the final decision of all the
scriptures (sastras) is that such destruction of the mind
alone is liberation (mukti), to read scriptures unlimitedly is
fruitless.
In order to destroy the mind, it is necessary to
enquire who one is; then how, instead of enquiring thus
within oneself, to enquire and know who one, is in
scriptures ?
For Rama to know himself to be Rama, is a
mirror necessary ?
(That is to say, for one to know oneself
through Self-attention to be ‘I am’, are scriptures
necessary ?)
‘Oneself’ is within the five sheaths, whereas the
scriptures are outside them.
Therefore, how can oneself,
who is to be attended to within, setting aside even the five
sheaths, be found in scriptures? Since scripture-enquiry is
futile, one should give it up and take to Self-enquiry” – thus
says Bhagavan Sri Ramana. By means of an example, let us make more clear this
technique (sadhana) of fixing the attention only on Self,
which has been described above in the words of Sri
Bhagavan. But from the very outset it must be conceded
that, since the nature of Self is unique and beyond comparison, it cannot be explained fully and accurately by
anyone through any example whatsoever.
Though most of
the examples which have been given in accordance with the
intellectual development of the people and the different
circumstances of their times may be appropriate to a great
extent, these insentient (jada) examples can never fully
explain Self, the sentient (chit).
The example of a cinema
projector often pointed out by Sri Bhagavan and the
fallowing example of a reflected ray of the sun from a mirror
are given solely with the view that they may remove many
doubts of the readers and clarify their understanding. But
one should not fall into the error of stretching the example
too far, as did the blind man who concluded, ‘My child
swallowed a crane’, when he was told, ‘Milk is white’.
A broken piece of mirror is lying on the ground in the
open space, in full sunshine. The sunlight that falls on that
piece of mirror is, reflected, and the reflected light enters a
nearby dark room and falls on its inner wall. The ray from
the mirror to the inside wall of the dark room is a reflected
ray of the sun. By means of this reflected ray, a man in the
dark room is able to see the objects inside that room.
The reflected light, when seen on the wall, is of the same form
or shape as the piece of mirror (triangular, square or round).
But the direct sunlight (the original light, the source of the
reflected ray) in the open space shines indivisible, single,
all-pervading and unlimited by any specific form or shape.
Self, our existence-consciousness, is similar to the direct
sunlight in the open space. The ego-feeling or mind knowledge, the ‘I am the body’ – consciousness, is similar
to the reflected ray stretching from the mirror to the inner
wall of the room. Since Self-consciousness is limitless like
the vast, all-pervading direct sunlight, it has no form adjunct (rupa-upadhi).
Since, just as the reflected ray takes
on the limitations and size of the piece of mirror, the egofeeling experiences the size and form of a body as ‘I’, it has
adjuncts. Just as the objects in the dark room are cognized
by means of the reflected light, the body and world are
cognized only by means of the mind knowledge.
“Although the world and the mind rise and set together,
it is by the mind alone that the world shines...”.
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 7
Let us suppose that a man in the dark room wants to
stop observing the objects in the room, which are seen by
means of the reflected light, and is possessed instead by a
longing to see its source, ‘Whence comes this light ?’. If so,
he should go to the very spot where the reflected beam
strikes the wall, position his eyes and look back along the
beam. What does he see then ? The sun ! But what he now
sees is not the real sun; it is only a reflection of it,
Furthermore, it will appear to him as if the sun is lying at
a certain spot on the ground outside the room! The
particular spot where the sun is seen lying outside can even
be pointed out as being so many feet to the right or left of the room (like saying, “Two digits ‘to the right from the
centre of the chest is the heart”). But, does the sun really lie
thus on the ground at that spot ? No, that is only the place
whence the reflected beam rises ! What should he do if he
wants to see the real sun ! He must keep his eyes positioned
along the straight line in which the reflected beam comes
and, without moving them to either side of it. follow it
towards the reflected sun which is then visible to him.
Just as the man in the dark room, deciding to see the
source of the reflected beam which has come into the room,
gives up the desire either to enjoy or to make research about
the things there with the help of that reflected beam, so a
man who wants to know the real Light (Self) must give up
all efforts towards enjoying or knowing about the various
worlds which shine only by means of the mind-light
functioning through the five senses, since he cannot know
Self either if he is deluded by cognizing and desiring
external objects (like a worldly man) or if he is engaged in
investigating them (like our modern scientists). This giving
up of attention towards external sense-objects is
desirelessness (vairagya) or inward renunciation. The
eagerness to see whence the reflected ray comes into the
room corresponds to the eagerness to see whence the ego.
‘I’, the mind-light, rises. This eagerness is love for Self
(swatma-bhakti). Keeping the eyes positioned along the
straight line of the beam without straying away to one side
or the other corresponds to the one-pointed attention fixed
unswervingly on the ‘I’ – consciousness. Is not the man now
moving along the straight line of the reflected beam from
the dark room towards the piece of mirror lying outside?
This moving corresponds to diving within towards the
Heart.
“Just as one would dive in order to find something
that had fallen into the water, so one should dive
within with a keen (introverted) mind, controlling
breath and speech, and know the rising-place of
the rising ego. Know thus !”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 28
Some, taking only the words ‘should dive within
controlling breath and speech’, set out to practise exercises
of breath control (pranayama).
Although it is a fact that the
breath stops in the course of enquiry, for it to be stopped the
roundabout way of pranayama is not necessary. When the
mind, with a tremendous longing to find the source which
gives it light, turns inwards, the breath stops
automatically 69! If the breath of the enquirer is exhaled at
the time of his mind thus giving up knowing external sense objects (vishayas) and starting to attend to its original form
of light, Self, it automatically remains outside without being
again drawn in. Likewise, if it is inhaled at that time, it
automatically remains inside without being again exhaled !
These are to be taken as ‘external retention’ (bahya
kumbhaka) and ‘internal retention’ (antara kumbhaka)
respectively. Until there is a rising of a thought on account
of non-vigilance (pramada) in Self-attention, this retention
(kumbhaka) will continue in an enquirer quite effortlessly.
By a little scrutiny, will it not be clear to anyone that even
in our everyday life when some startling news is suddenly
brought to us or when we try to recollect a forgotten thing with full concentration, the breath stops automatically on
account of the keenness of mind (the intensity of
concentration) that takes place then?
Similarly, the breath
will stop automatically as soon as the mind, with an intense
longing to see its original form of light and with earnest one pointedness, begins to turn keenly and remain within. In
this state of retention (kumbhaka), no matter how long it
continues, the enquirer does not experience suffocation, that
is, the urge to exhale or inhale. But while practicing
pranayama, if the units of time (matras) of the retention are
increased, one does experience suffocation. If the enquirer’s
attention is so intensely fixed on Self that he does not even
care to know whether the breath has stopped or not, then
his state of retention is involuntary and without struggle.
There are some aspirants, however, who try to know at that
time whether or not the ‘breath has stopped. This is wrong,
for since the attention is thus focusing on the breath, Self attention will be lost and thereby various thoughts will
shoot up and the flow of sadhana will be interrupted,
That
is why Sri Bhagavan advised, ‘Control breath and speech
with a keen (introverted) mind’. It would be wise to
understand this verse thus, by adding ‘with a keen mind’
(kurnda matiyal) in all the three places,
‘Control the breath
with a keen mind dive within with a keen mind, and know
the rising-place with a keen mind’. By his very moving along it, does not the man who
positions his eyes on the reflected beam reduce its length?
Just as the length of the beam decreases as he advances, so
also the mind’s tendency of expanding shrinks more and
more as the aspirant perseveres in sincerely seeking its
source.
“… When the attention goes deeper and deeper
within along the (reflected) ray ‘I’, its length decrease more and more, and when the ray ‘I’ dies,
that which shines as ‘I’ is Jnana, “
‘Atma Vichara Patikam’, verse 9
When the man finally reaches very near to the piece of
mirror, he can be said to have reached the very source of
the reflected ray. This is similar to the aspirant diving
within and reaching the source (Heart) whence he had
risen. Does not the man now attain a state where the length
of the reflected ray is reduced to nothing – a state where no
reflection is possible because he is so close to the mirror?
Similarly, when the aspirant, on account of his diving
deeper and deeper within by an intense effort of Self attention, is so close to his source that not even an iota of
rising of the ego is possible, he remains absorbed in the
great dissolution of the ‘I am the body’ – feeling (dehatmabuddhi), which he had hitherto had as a target of attention,
This dissolution is what Sri Bhagavan refers to when He
says, ‘I’ will die”, in ‘Upadesa Undhiyar’ verse 19.
Because of his mere search for the source of the
reflected ray of the sun, does not the man now, after leaving
the dark room, stand in the open space in a state of void
created by the non-existence of that reflected ray? This is
the state of the aspirant remaining in the Heart-space
(hridayakasa) in the state of great void (maha sunya)
created, through mere Self-attention, by the non-existence
of the ego-’I’. The man who has come out of the room into
the open space is dazed and laments, “Alas ! The sun that
guided me so far (the reflected sun) is now lost”, At this
moment, a friend of his standing in the open space comes
to him with these words of solace, “Where were you all this
time? Were you not in the dark room! Where are you now?
Are you not in the open space! When you were in the dark room, that which guided you out was just one thin ray of
light; but here (in this vast open space) are not the rays of
light countless and in an unlimited mass? What you saw
previously was not even the direct sunlight, but only a
reflected ray! But what you are now experiencing is the
direct (saksha) sunlight. When the place where you are now
is nothing but the unlimited space of light, can a darkness
come into existence because of the void created by the
disappearance of the reflected ray? Can its disappearance be
a loss? Know that its disappearance itself is the true light;
it is not darkness”.
Similarly, by the experience of the great void (maha
sunya) created by the annihilation of the ego, the aspirant
is some-what taken aback, ‘Alas ! Even the ‘I’ consciousness
(the ego) which I was attending to in my sadhana till now
as a beacon-light is lost ! Then is there really no such thing
at all as ‘Self’ (atman)?”. At that very moment, the Sadguru,
who is ever shining as his Heart, points out to him thus,
“Can the destruction of the ego, which is only an
infinitesimal reflected consciousness, be really a loss? Are
you not clearly aware not only of its former existence, but
also of the present great void created by its disappearance?
Therefore, know that you, who know even the void as ‘this
is a void’, alone are the true knowledge; you are not a
void !”, in an instant as a direct experience of the shining
of his own existence-consciousness by touching (flashing as
sphurana) in Heart as Heart!
The aspirant who started the
search ‘Whence am I?’ or ‘Who am I ?’ now attains the non dual Self-knowledge, the true knowledge ‘I am that I am’,
which is devoid of the limitations of a particular place or
time.
Clinging to the consciousness ‘I’ and thereby acquiring
a greater and greater intensity of concentration upon it,
is diving deep within. Instead of thus diving within, many,
thinking that they are engaged in Self-enquiry, sit down for
hours together simply repeating mentally or vocally, “Who
am I ?” or “Whence am I?”. There are others again who,
when they sit for enquiry, face their thoughts and endlessly
repeat mentally the following questions taught by
Sri Bhagavan. “To whom come these thoughts? To me;
who am I?”, or sometimes they even wait for the next
thought to come up so that they can fling these questions
at it! Even this is futile Did we sit to hold thus a court of
enquiry, calling one thought after another! Is this the
sadhana of diving within! Therefore, we should not
remain watching ‘What is the next thought?’. Merely to keep
on questioning in this manner is not Self-attention.
Concerning those who thus merely float on the surface of
the thought-waves; keeping their mind on these questions
instead of diving within by attending to the existence consciousness with a keen mind, thereby controlling mind,
breath and all the activities of the body and senses, Sri
Bhagavan says:
“Compare him who asks himself ‘Who am I?’ and
‘From which place am I?’, though he himself exists
all the while as Self, to a drunken man who
prattles ‘Who am I?’ and ‘Where am I?’.”
‘
Ekatma Panchakam’,verse 2
and further, He asks:
“…How to attain that state wherein ‘I’ does not rise
the state of egolessness (the great void or maha
sunya) – unless (instead of floating like this) we
seek the place whence ‘I’ rises?
And unless we attain that (egolessness), say, how to abide in the
state of Self, where ‘We are That’ (soham)?”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 27.
Therefore, all that we are to practise is to be still
(summa iruppadu) with the remembrance of the feeling ‘I’.
It is only when there is a slackness of vigilance during Self attention that thoughts, which are an indication of it, will
rise. In other words, if thoughts rise it means that our Self attention is lost. It is only as a contrivance to win back Self attention from thought – attention that Sri Bhagavan advised
us to ask, ’To whom do these thoughts appear?’ Since the
answer ‘To me’ is only a dative form of ‘I’, it will easily
remind us of the nominative form, the feeling ‘I’. However,
if we question, ‘Who thinks these thoughts?’, since the
nominative form, the feeling ‘I’, is obtained as an answer,
will not Self-attention, which has been lost unnoticed, be
regained directly? This regaining of Self-attention is actually
being Self (that is, remaining or abiding as Self)! Such
‘being’ alone is the correct sadhana71; sadhana is not doing,
but being!!
Some complain, “When the very rising of the ego from
sleep is so surreptitious as to elude our notice, how can we
see whence it rises? It seems to be impossible!” That is true,
because the mind’s effort of attention is absent in sleep,
since the mind itself is not at all there! As ordinary people
are not acquainted with the knowledge of their ‘being’ but
only with the knowledge of their ‘doing’ (that is, the
knowledge of their making efforts), for such people it is
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“What our Lord Ramana firmly advises us to take to, as the greatest
and most powerful tapas is only this much, ‘Be still’ (summa iru), and
not anything (dhyana, yoga and so on) as the duty to be performed
by the mind.”
‘Guru Vachaka Kovai’ verse 773
The Technique of Self-enquiry
impossible to know from sleep the rising of the ego from
there. Since the effort considered by them as necessary is
absent in sleep, it is no wonder that they are unable to
commence the enquiry from sleep itself! But, since the
whole of the waking state is a mere sportive play of the ego
and since the effort of the mind here is under the
experience of everyone, at least in the waking state one can
turn and attend to the pseudo ‘I’ shining in the form ‘I am
so-and-so’.
“ ‘Turning inwards, daily see thyself with an
Introverted look and it (the Reality) will be known’
– thus didst Thou tell me, O my Arunachala!”
‘Sri Arunachala Aksharamanamalai’, verse 44
The enquiry begins only during the leisure hours of
the waking state when one sits for practice. Just as a thing
comes to our memory when its name, is thought of, does
not the first person feeling come to everyone’s memory as
soon as the name (pronoun) ‘I’ is thought of? Although this
first person feeling is only the ego, the pseudo ‘I’-
consciousness, it does not matter. Having our attention
withdrawn from second and third persons and clinging to
the first person – that alone is sadhana. As soon as the
attention turns towards the first person feeling, not only do
other thoughts disappear, but also the first thought, the
rising and expanding pseudo ‘I’-consciousness, itself begins
contracting !
“When the mind, the ego, which wanders outside
knowing only other objects (second and third
persons), begins to attend to its own nature, all
other objects will’ disappear and, by experiencing
its true nature (Self), the pseudo ‘I’ will also die.”
‘Guru Vachaka Kovai’, verse 193
“...If the fickle mind turns towards the first person,
the first person (the ego) will become non-existent
and That which really exists will then shine
forth…”
‘Atma Vichara Patikam’, verse 6
“...Attending to the first person is equal to
committing suicide...”
‘Atma Vichara Patikam’, verse 7
This is the great revelation made by Bhagavan Sri
Ramana and bestowed by Him as a priceless boon upon the
world of spiritual aspirants in order to bring Vedanta easily
under practical experience.
Just as a rubber ball gains greater and greater
momentum while bouncing down the staircase, the more
the concentration in clinging to the first person
consciousness is intensified the faster is the contraction of
the first thought (the ego), till finally it merges in its source.
That which now merges thus is only the adjunct (upadhi),
the feeling ‘so-and-so’ which, at the moment of waking,
came and mixed with the pure existence-consciousness,
which was shining in sleep as ‘I am’, to constitute the form
of the ego, ‘I am so-and-so’, ‘I am this’ or ‘I am that’. That
is, what has come and mixed now slips away. All that an
aspirant can experience in the beginning of his practice is
only the slipping away (subsidence) of the ego. Since the
aspirant tracks down the ego from the waking state, where
it is in full play, in the beginning it is possible for him to
cognize only its removal. But to cognize its rising (how it
rises and holds on to ‘I am’) from sleep will be more
difficult for him at this stage.
When Self-attention is started from the waking
consciousness ‘I am so-and-so’, since it is only the adjunct,
the feeling ‘so-and-so’, that slips away (because it is merely
non-existent, an unreal thing [the unreal dies and the
Reality alone survives, ‘satyameva jayate’), the aspirant even
now (when ‘so-and-so’ has dropped off) feels no loss to the
consciousness ‘I am’ which he had experienced in the
waking state. Now he attains a state which is similar to the
sleep he has experienced every day and which is devoid of
all and everything (because, ‘The ego is verily all –
sarvam’, since the whole universe, which is nothing but
thoughts, is an expansion of the ego). But a great difference
is now experienced by him between the sleep that, without
his knowledge, has been coming and overwhelming him all
these days due to the complete exhaustion of mind and
body, and this sleep which is now voluntarily brought on
and experienced by him with the full consciousness of the
waking state. How?
“Because there is consciousness, this is not sleep,
and because there is the absence of thoughts, it is
not the waking state it is therefore the existence consciousness (sat-chit), the unbroken nature of
Siva (akhanda siva-swarupam). Without leaving it,
abide in it with great love.”
‘Sadhanai Saram’ 7
Whenever the aspirant during the time of sadhana
becomes extroverted from this voluntarily brought-about
sleep-like state, he feels absolutely certain, ‘I was not
sleeping, but was all the while fully conscious of myself’.
But, though his real aspect (existence-consciousness) is ever
knowing without he least doubt its own existence in sleep
as ‘I am’, whenever he becomes extroverted from everyday
sleep, since he (the mind) did not even once have the
experience of continuing to know ‘I am’ from the waking
state, he can only say, ‘I slept, I did not know myself at that
time’, The truth is this: since the state of his Self-existence,
devoid of the adjunct ‘so-and-so’, is traced out and caught
hold of in the voluntarily brought-about sleep with the full
consciousness (prajna) continuing from the waking state, the
knowledge that the pure existence-consciousness (sat-chit}
knows itself as ‘I am’ is clear in this sleep state. That is why
the aspirant now says, ‘I did exist throughout, I did not
sleep’ ! But prior to his sadhana, since he was throughout
the waking state identifying as ‘I’ the mind, which is the
form of the adjunct ‘so-and-so’, after waking up from the
ordinary daily sleep, where the mind did not exist, this
mind (the man) says, ‘I did not exist in sleep’! That is all !!
Those who experience many times this removal of the
ego through practice, since they have an acquaintance with
the experience of their pure existence-consciousness as ‘I
am’ even after the removal of the ego, can minutely cognize,
even at the moment of just waking up from sleep, how the
adjunct ‘so-and-so’ comes and mixes. Those who do not
have such strength of practice cannot cognize, from sleep
itself, the ego at its place of rising. The only thing that is
easy for them is to find the ego’s place of setting (which is
also its place of rising) through the effort started from the
waking state. In either case, the end and the achievement
will be the same. When the attention is focused deeper and
deeper within towards the feeling ‘I am’ and when the ego
thereby shrinks more and more into nothingness, our power
of attention becomes subtler than the subtlest atom and
thereby grows sharper and brighter. Hence, the strength of
abidance (nishtha-bala) will now be achieved to remain
balanced between two states, that is, in a state after the end
of sleep and before waking up, in other words, before being
possessed by the first thought. Through this strength, the
skill will now be gained by the aspirant to find out the
adjunct ‘so and so’, which comes and mixes, to be a mere
second person (that is, although it has hitherto been
appearing as if it were the first person, it will now be clearly
seen to be his mere shadow, non-Self, the primal sheath, a
thing alien to him). This is what Janaka, the royal Sage,
meant when he said, “I have found out the thief (the time
of his coming – the time and place. of the ego’s rising) who
has been ruining me all along; I will inflict the right
punishment upon him”. Since the ego, which was acting till
now as if it were the first person, is found to be a second
person alien to us, the right punishment is to destroy it at
its very place of rising (just as the reflected ray is destroyed
at its place of rising) by clinging steadfastly to the real first
person (the real import of the word ‘I’), existence consciousness, through the method of regaining Self attention taught by Bhagavan Sri Ramana (‘To whom? To
me; who am I?’),
“As you practise more and more abiding in this
existence-consciousness (that is, remaining in the
state between sleep and waking), the ordinary
sleep which had previously been taking possession
of you will melt away, and the waking which was
full of sense-knowledges (vishayas) will not creep
in again, Therefore repeatedly and untiringly abide
in it,”
‘Sadhanai Saram’
By greater and more steadfast practice of abiding in
this existence-consciousness, we will experience that this
state seems to come often and take possession of us of
its own accord whenever we are free from our daily work.
But, since this state of existence-consciousness is in
fact nothing but ‘we’, it is wrong to think that such a
state comes and takes possession of us! While at work, we
attend to other things; after that work is over and before we
attend to some other second or third person, we naturally
abide in our real state, existence-consciousness. Though this
happens to one and all every day, it is only to those who
have the experience of Self-consciousness through the
aforesaid practice that the state of Self-abidance will be
clearly discerned after leaving one second parson thought
and before catching another one (that is, between two
thoughts).
“Why has it been said (in the above two verses of
‘Sadhana Saram’) that one ought to make effort
repeatedly to be in that state (our existence consciousness) and ought to abide in it with more
and more love? Because, until all the tendencies
(vasanas) which drive one out of it are completely
exhausted, this state will seem to come and go.
Hence the need for continued effort and love to
abide in Self.”
“When, through this practice, our state of existence
consciousness is experienced always as
inescapably natural, then there will be no harm
even if waking, dream and sleep pass across,”
“For those who are well established in the
unending Self-consciousness, which pervades and
transcends all these three so-called states (waking,
dream and sleep), there is but one state, the
Whole, the All, and that alone is real! This state,
which is devoid even of the feeling ‘I am making
effort’, is your natural state of being! Be!!”
‘Sadhanai Saram’
Just as the man came out into the open space from the
dark room by steadfastly holding on to and moving along
the reflected ray, so the enquirer reaches the open space of
Heart, coming out of the prison – the attachment to the
body through the nerves (nadis) -, by assiduously holding
on to the feeling ‘I am’. Let us now see how this process
takes place in the body of an advanced enquirer.
Just on waking up from sleep, a consciousness ‘I’
shoots up like a flash of lightening from the Heart to the
brain. From the brain, it then spreads throughout the body
along the nerves (nadis). This ‘I’ consciousness is like
electrical energy. Its impetus or voltage is the force of
attachment (abhimana-vega) with which it identifies a body
as ‘I’. This consciousness, which spreads with such a
tremendous impetus and speed all over the body as ‘I’,
remains pure, having no adjunct (upadhi) attached to it, till
it reaches the brain from the Heart. But, since its force of
attachment (abhimana-vega) is so great that the time taken
by it to shoot up from the Heart to the brain is extremely
short, one millionth of a second so to speak, ordinary
people are unable to cognize it in its pure condition, devoid
of any adjunct. This pure condition of the rising ‘I’ -
consciousness is what was pointed out by Sri Bhagavan
when He said, “In the space between two states or two
thoughts, the pure ego (the pure condition or true nature of
the ego) is experienced”, in ‘Maharshi’s Gospel’, Book One,
chapter five, entitled ‘Self and Ego’.
For this ‘I’ – consciousness that spreads from the brain
at a tremendous speed throughout the body, the nerves
(nadis) are the transmission lines, like wires for electrical
power, (How many they are is immaterial here.) The mixing
of the pure consciousness ‘I am’, after reaching the brain,
with an adjunct as ‘I am this, I am so-and-so, I am the body’
is what is called bondage (bandham) or the knot (granthi).
This knot has two forms: the knot of bondage to the nerves
(nadi-bandha-granthi) and the knot of attachment
(abhimana--granthi). The connection of this power, the ‘I’-
consciousness, with the gross nervous system is called ‘the
knot of bondage to the nerves’ (nadi bandha granthi), and
its connection (its dehabhimana) with the causal body,
whose form is the latent tendencies, is called ‘the knot of
attachment’ (abhimana-granthi), The knot of bondage to the
nerves pertains to the breath (prana), while the knot of
attachment pertains to the mind.
“Mind and breath (prana) which have thought and
action as their respective functions, are like two
diverging branches of the trunk of a tree, but their
root (the activating power) is one.”
‘Upadesa Undhiyar’, verse 12
Since the source of the mind and the prana is one
(the Heart), when the knot of attachment (abhimana-granthi)
is severed by the annihilation of the mind through
Self-enquiry, the knot of bondage to the nerves (nadi
bandha-granthi) is also severed. In raja yoga, after removing
the knot of bondage to the nerves by means of breathcontrol, if the mind which is thus controlled is made to
enter the Heart from the brain (sahasrara), since it reaches
its source, then the knot of attachment is also severed.
“When the mind which has been subdued by
breath control is led (to the Heart) through the
only path (the path of knowing Self), its form
will die.”
‘Upadesa Undhiyar’, verse 14
However, since the knot of attachment is the basic
one, until and unless the destruction of attachment
(abhimana) is effected, by knowing self, even when the knot
of bondage to the nerves is temporarily removed in sleep,
swoon, death or by the use of anesthetics, the knot of
attachment remains unaffected in the form of tendencies
(vasanas), which constitute the causal body, and, hence
rebirths are inescapable. This is why Sri Bhagavan insists
that one reaching kashta-nirvikalpa-samadhi through raja
yoga should not stop there (since it is only mano-laya, a
temporary absorption of the mind), but that the mind so
absorbed should be led to the Heart in order to attain
sahaja-nirvikalpa-samildhi, which is the destruction of the
mind (mano-nasa), the destruction of the attachment to the body (dehabhimana-nasa).
In the body of such a Self realized One (sahaja jnani), the coursing of the ‘I’ -
consciousness along the nerves, even after the destruction
of the knot of attachment, is like the water on a lotus leaf
or like a burnt rope, and thus it cannot cause bondage.
Therefore the destruction of the knot of attachment is
anyway indispensable for the attainment of the natural state
(Sahaja Sthiti), the state of the destruction of the tendencies
(vasanakshaya).
The nerves (nadis) are gross, but the consciousness
power (chaitanya-sakti) that courses through them is subtle.
The connection of the ‘I’-consciousness with the nerves is
similar to that of the electrical power with the wires, that
is, it is so unstable that it can be disconnected or connected
in a second. Is it not an experience common to one and all
that this connection is daily broken in sleep and effected in
the waking state? When this connection is effected, body consciousness rises, and when it is broken, body consciousness is lost. Here it is to be remembered what has
already been stated, namely that body-consciousness and
world-consciousness are one and the same. So, like our
clothes and ornaments which are daily removed and put on,
this knot is alien to us, a transitory and false entity hanging
loosely on us! This is what Sri Bhagavan referred to when
He said, “We can detach ourself from what we are not”!
Disconnecting the knot in such a way that it will never
again come into being is called by many names such as ‘the
cutting of the knot’ (granthi-bheda). ‘the destruction of the
mind’ (mano-nasa) and so on. ‘In such a way that it will
never again come into being’ means this: by attending to it
(the ego) through the enquiry ‘Does it in truth exist at
present?’ in order to find out whether it had ever really
come into being, there takes place the dawn of knowledge (jnana), the real waking, where it is clearly and firmly
known that no such knot has ever come into being, that no
such ego has ever risen, that ‘that which exists’ alone ever
exists, and that which was existing as ‘I am’ is ever existing
as ‘I am’! The attainment of this knowledge (Self-knowledge
or atma-jnana), the knowledge that the knot or bondage is
at all times non-existent and has never risen, is the
permanent disconnecting of the knot. Let us explain this
with a small story.
“Alas! I am imprisoned! I have been caught within this
triangular room! How to free myself?” – thus was a man
complaining and sobbing, standing in a corner where the
ends of two walls joined. Groping on the two walls in front
of him with his two hands, he was lamenting, “No doorway
is available, nor even any kind of outlet for me to escape
through ! How can I get out?”
Another man, a friend of his who was standing at a
distance in the open, heard the lamenting, turned in that
direction and noticed the state of his friend. There were
only two walls in that open space. They were closing only
two sides, one end of each of them meeting the other. The
friend in the open quickly realized that the man, who was
standing facing only the two walls in front of him, had
concluded, due to the wrong notion that there was a third
wall behind him, that he was imprisoned within a three walled room. So he asked, “Why are you lamenting, groping
on the walls?” “I am searching for a way through which to
escape from the prison of this triangular room, but I don’t
find any way out !” replied the man.
The friend: “Well, why don’t you search for a way out on
the third wall behind you !” The man (turning behind and looking): “Ah, here there is no
obstacle ! Let me run away through this way.” (So
saying, he started to run away.)
The friend: “What ! Why do you run away? Is it necessary
for you to do so? If you do not run away, will you
remain in prison ?”
The man: “Oho! yes, yes ! I was not at all imprisoned ! How
could I have been imprisoned when there was no wall
at all behind me” It was merely my own delusion that
I was imprisoned, was never imprisoned, nor am I’
now released ! So I do not even need to run away
from near these walls where I am now ! The defect of
my not looking behind was the reason for my so called bondage; and the turning of my attention
behind is really the sadhana for my so-called
liberation! In reality, I am ever remaining as I am,
without any imprisonment or release !”
Thus knowing the truth, he remained quiet.
The two walls in the story signify the second and
third persons. The first person is the third wall said to be
behind the man. There is no way at all to liberation by
means of second and third person attention. Only by the
first person attention ‘Who am I?’ will the right knowledge
be gained that the ego, the first person, is ever non-existent,
and only when the first person is thus annihilated will the
truth be realized that bondage and liberation are false.
‘’So long as one thinks like a madman ‘I am a
bound one’, thoughts of bondage and liberation
will last. But when looking into oneself ‘Who is
this bound one? the eternally free and ever shining Self alone will (be found to) exist.
Thus,
T where the thought of bondage no longer stands,
can the thought of liberation still endure !”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 39
Just as we have explained the three walls as
representing the three places, the first, second and third
persons, we can also explain them as representing the three
times, the present, past and future. Even through the
attention to the present – avoiding all thoughts of past and
future – in order to know what is the truth of the present,
all thoughts will subside and the ‘present’ itself will vanish.
How? That which happened one moment before now is
considered by us to be past, and that which will happen
one moment from now is considered to be future. Therefore
without paying attention to any time even one moment
before or after this, if we try to know what that one moment
is that exists now, then even one millionth of the so-called
present moment will be found to be either past or future. If
even such subtlest past and future moments are also not
attended to and if we try to know what is in between these
two, the past and future, we will find that nothing can be
found as an exact present. Thus the conception of present
time will disappear, being non-existent, and the Selfexistence which transcends time and place alone will then
survive.
“The past and future can exist only with reference
to the present, which is daily experienced; they
too, while occurring, were and will be the present.
Therefore, (among the three times) the present
alone exists. Trying to know the past and future
without knowing the truth of the present (i.e. its
non-existence) is like trying to count without
(knowing the value of the unit) one !”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 16
“When scrutinized, we – the ever-known existing
Thing – alone are; then where is time and where
is piece? If we are (mistaken to be) the body, we
shall be involved in time and place; but, are we
the body? Since we are the One, now, then and
ever, that One in space, here, there and
everywhere, we – the timeless and spaceless Self
-alone are !”
‘Ulladhu Narpadhu’, verse 18
Hence, attending to the first place (the first person)
among the three places or attending to the present time
among the three times is the only path to liberation. Even
this, the path of Sri Ramana is not really for the removal of
bondage or for the attainment of liberation! The path of Sri
Ramana is paved solely for the purpose of our ever abiding
in our eternal state of pure bliss, by giving up even the
thought of liberation through the dawn of the right
knowledge that we have never been in bondage.
“Only the first place or the present time is advised
to be attended to. If you keenly do so, you will
enjoy the bliss of Self, having completed all
yogas and having achieved the supreme
accomplishment. Know and feast on it!”
‘Sadhanai Saram’
Let us now again take up our original point. When the
attention of an aspirant is turned towards second and third
persons, the ‘I’-consciousness spreads from the brain all over
the body through the nerves (nadis) in the form of the
power of spreading; but when the same attention is focused
on the first person, since it is used in an opposite direction,
the ‘I’ -consciousness, instead of functioning in the form of
the power of spreading, takes the form of the power of Selfattention (that is, the power of ‘doing’ is transformed into
the power of ‘being’). This is what is called ‘the churning of
the nadis’ (nadi-mathana). By the churning thus taking place
in the nadis, the ‘I’-consciousness scattered throughout the
nadis turns back, withdraws and collects in the brain, the
starting point of its spreading, and from there it reaches,
drowns and is established in the Heart, the pure
consciousness, the source of its rising.
In raja-yoga, the ‘I’-consciousness pervading all the
nadis is forcibly pushed back to the starting point of its
spreading by the power generated through the pressure of
breath-retention (prana-kumbhaka). But this is a violent
method. The following is what Sri Bhagavan used to say:
“Forcibly pushing back the ‘I’ – consciousness by breathretention, as is done in raja yoga, is a violent method, like
chasing a run-away cow, beating it, catching hold of it,
dragging it forcibly to the shed and finally tying it there; on
the other hand, bringing back the ‘I’-consciousness to its
source by enquiry is a gentle and peaceful method, like
tempting the cow by showing it a handful of green grass,
cajoling and fondling it, making it follow us of its own
accord to the shed and finally tying it there”. This is a safe
and pleasant path, To bear the churning of the nadis
effected through the method of breath-retention in raja yoga,
the body must be young and strong. If such a churning is
made to happen in a body which is weak or old, since the
body does not have the strength to bear it, many troubles
may occur such as nervous disorders, physical diseases,
insanity and so on. But there is no room for any such
dangers if the churning is made to take place through
enquiry.
“To say, ‘By holding the attention on Self, the
consciousness and by practising abiding in it, he
became insane’, is just like saying, ‘By drinking the
nectar of immortality, he died’.”
‘Guru Vachaka Kovai’, verse 746
In the path of enquiry, withdrawal from the nadis
takes place without any strain and as peacefully as the
incoming of sleep. The rule found in. some sastras that the
goal should be reached before the age of thirty is therefore
applicable only in the path of raja yoga, and not in
enquiry?79, the path of Sri Ramana !
The channel through which the ‘I’-consciousness,
which has risen from the Heart and has spread all over the
body, is experienced while it is being withdrawn is called
the sushumna nadi. Not taking into consideration the legs
and arms, since they are only subsidiary limbs, the channel
through which the ‘I’ -consciousness is experienced in the
trunk of the body from the base of the spine (muladhara) to
the top of the head (sahasrara) is alone the sushumna.
While the ‘I’ – consciousness is withdrawing through
the sushumna, an aspirant may have experiences of the
places of the six yogic centres (shadchakras) on the way, or
even without having them may reach the Heart directly.
While travelling in a train to Delhi, It is not necessary that
a man should see the stations and scenes on the way. Can
he not reach Delhi unmindful of them, sleeping happily?
However, due to the past devotional tendencies towards the
different names and forms of God, which are bound by time
and place, some aspirants may have experiences of the six
yogic centres and of divine visions, sounds and so on
therein. But for those who do not have such obstacles in the
form of tendencies, the journey will be pleasant and without
any distinguishing feature (visesha). In the former case,
these experiences are due to non-vigilance (pramada) in
Self-attention, for they are nothing but a second person
attention taking place there! This itself betrays that the
attention to Self is lost! For those tremendously earnest
aspirants who do not at all give room to non-vigilance in
Self-attention, these objective experiences will never occur!
The following replies of Sri Ramakrishna are worth being
noted in this context: When Swami Vivekananda reported
to Him, “All say that they have had visions, but I have not
seen any !” the Guru said, “That is good !” On another
occasion, when Swami Vivekananda reported that some
occult powers (siddhis) such as clairvoyance seemed to have
been gained by him in the course of his sadhana, his Guru
warned him “Stop your sadhana for some time, Let them
leave you!” It is therefore clear from this that such
experiences can be had only by those who delay by often
stopping on the way on account of their Self-attention being
obstructed by lack of vigilance (pramada).
Even though the ‘I’-consciousness while being
withdrawn courses only along the sushumna nadi, on
account of its extreme brilliance it illumines the five sense
organs (jnanendriyas), which are near the sushumna, and
hence the above–mentioned experiences happen. How?
When the light of ‘I’-consciousness stationed in the
sushumna illumines the eye, the organ of sight, there will
be visions of Gods and many celestial worlds; when it
illumines the ear, the organ of hearing, celestial sounds will
be heard such as the playing of divine instruments (deva
dundubhi), the ringing of divine bells, Omkara and so on;
when it illumines the organ of smell, delightful divine
fragrances will be smelt; when it illumines the organ of
taste, delicious celestial nectar will be tasted; and when it
illumines the organ of touch, a feeling of extreme pleasure
will permeate the entire body or a feeling of floating in an
ocean of pleasantness will be experienced. There is no
wonder that these experiences appear to be clearer and of
greater reality than the sense-experiences in the ordinary
waking state, because the experiences of the present waking
world are gained through the gross five senses, which are
functioning by the impure ‘I’ – consciousness scattered all
over the body, whereas these experiences of celestial worlds
are gained through the subtle five senses, which are
functioning by the pure, focused ‘I’ – consciousness. Yet all
these are only qualified mental experiences (visesha-manaanubhavas) and not the unqualified Self-experience
(nirvisesha-ekatma-anubhava)
Since the mind is now very subtle and brilliant
because it is withdrawn from all the other nadis into the
sushumna, and since it is extremely pure because it is free
from worldly desires, it is now able to project through the
subtle five senses only the past auspicious tendencies
(purva subha vasanas) as described above. However, just
because of these visions and the like, one should not
conclude that the mind has been transformed into Self
(atman). Even now there has not been destruction of the
mind (mono-nasa). Being still alive with auspicious
tendencies, it creates and perceives subtler and more
lustrous second and third person objects, and finds
enjoyment in them. So this is not at all the unqualified
experience of true knowledge (nirvisesha-jnana-anubhava),
which is the destruction of the tendencies (vasanakshaya).
Whatever appears and is experienced is only a second
person knowledge, which means that sadhana, the first
person attention, is lost at that time! Many are those who
take these qualified experiences (visesha-anubhavas) of
taste, light, sound and so on to be the final attainment of
Self-knowledge (brahma-jnana), and because they have had
these experiences they think that they have attained
liberation and they become more and more entangled in
attention to second and third persons, thus losing their
foothold on Self-attention. Such aspirants are called ‘those
fallen from yoga’ (yoga-bhrashtas). This is similar to a man
bound for Delhi getting down from the train at some
intermediate station, thinking ‘Verily, this is Delhi’, being
deluded by its attractive grandeur! Even siddhis, the
superhuman powers that may come during the course of
sadhana are only our illusion, barring our progress to
liberation and landing us in some unknown place.
190...
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